February 2000

Disclaimer - okay apologies for the delay between the last blog entry and this one but looking through the archives (old farm diaries, my cat diaries, photo albums and notes etc) has just taken up soooo much of my time - not to mention laughing at some of the fashions and hairstyles..........!!!

So I have been very busy recently, and as it is the start of the year, the main activity on the farm is grading, boxing and bagging potatoes - and I supervise this.  All the activity takes place in the shed (excellent as it is marginally warmer, I can combine it with rodent patrol, and there is always a cushion, potato sack, bale of straw for me to sit on) 

A trailer load of potatoes comes into the shed, is tipped and the potatoes are sorted over a conveyor belt type thing (very noisy), the skanky  potatoes are picked out and the rest go into bags or boxes - it is all done from this machine, and is quite impressive.  Elsewhere on the farm, the old shed buildings are coming down (old wooden ones which are one of my stamping grounds but are falling to bits) and a new one is going up - this is a metal one.  There is always something going on down on the farm, and the workmen on the shed seem quite nice, one calls me, "Pusskat" and offers me some cheese (yum, my favourite thing....well, one of them!) And anyway, when I am bored I can go and have a sleep and feed in the garage or go on through to the lounge. It seems humans have not grasped the regular sleep/cat naps thing, and only sleep at night which is very strange.  

Also, I have learned what the words "honeymoon" and "cattery" mean......and they were not as bad as I had feared - "Face up to your fears, and be brave"  is a good lesson to learn.  It turns out that a honeymoon is a holiday after a wedding - Mum and Dad only had a week off after their wedding last year, and have had two weeks in Kenya (Mum said it was a one off "holiday of a lifetime" as it was a special occasion, and somewhere they have always wanted to go) which is in Africa.  So, I also had a holiday at a cattery - a kind of exec holiday home for discerning cats.  I liked Barbara the cattery owner very much, she left the radio on for us cats, there were heated pods to sleep in, ladders and sun lounge areas for us too. I also got to talk to a couple of neighbouring cats (in the next "apartments" to me) "it is very important to be interested in other people/cats/animals, after all, everyone has their story"

Mum and Dad has a great time in Africa (Mum said she saw some "real lions" - I am a real lion just a smaller version of one) and I loved being at the cattery although I liked coming home too. When the collected me, Barbara said, "He's been no trouble, he has not been bothered by anything and has eaten and purred well", Dad said, "Az cat takes everything in his stride" 
I think that is a real compliment, and something to live up to.  I was pleased to be home, and the next day, Will arrived back from his break at the other farm and we compared notes.  I have had a few new experiences this month, but it has been good!

this is me posing whilst sunbathing at the cattery ........................under my paws you can just see a stripey worm toy called "inch" that I took with me to the cattery and enjoyed playing with

January 2000

Yay!!  new year, new Millennium, new start...........and it dawns bright and sunny - so I have a celebratory and exploratory wander around my territory and Will and I sit outside for a bit in our own celebration, "I'm really glad came to live with us Az", says Will gruffly, "Me too", I tell him and add that he's "not too bad for a dog".    This is a standard joke as whenever Mum asks Dad if he loves me, he says, "Az is alright for a cat" - he is joking of course, who couldn't love me (apart from my old family of course) I am, after all perfect (or is that purrfect?!)  "It's very important to love yourself , and believe in yourself too"

Most of the work is being done at the other farm, so that gives me plenty of scope to go out and about inspecting the machinery- I am quite fearless, and perform very detailed checks.  Anyway, the other day when Mum picked me up - she holds me respectfully, picking me up with her right hand under my chest and her left hand under my bum, I did my usual thing of lifting my head up so I can rub the top of my head on her chin.  I do this because a) she loves it and b) I get a free head rub (it's a win win!) although it always amuses Dad "he always sticks his head out," he says.  This time, Mum was amused by my back feet and laughed (not unkindly, but still...) at them, saying they reminded her of "fish fingers" - I don't get this, fish do not have fingers - and "You should never laugh at someone, only with them" Mum did apologise though - and I got some different food to try.  They always cook something themselves but not a lot of it is cat-friendly, hence I have wet and dry cat food, and Will has wet and dry dog food, although he clearly has a less cultured palate than me...or indeed most other animals - and he is a bit uncouth about the way he eats - essentially he hoovers it up, and it would be in his stomach before he has even registered the taste!

Mysteriously, there have been discussions going on about holidays, cattery booking and late honeymoons - I have had to look up all of these words and I am not entirely sure I like the sound of them.......I have tried to discuss this with Will, but he always goes to stay at the other farm with Jake when Mum & Dad go away...he's never heard of a cattery, but then amazingly, he has never heard of a house cat either, he only knows of farm cats who come in as far as the conservatory and have beds in there (this is at the other farm) .... I am going to have to investigate further..............

this is me on an "elevator" inspecting it and having a good old nebs - an "elevator" is not the same as in some buildings (apparently) but used for moving bales of straw..............

December 1999

Looks like I spoke too soon in my last blog, it's been a lot colder and so wet that, to be honest, I have not really fancied going out and about.  I go outside to use the "facilities" (shall we say?!) and then I tend to come in and sleep in the house.  That said, I am on "rodent watch" in the evening and night-time sometimes, Mum keeps saying to me, "They're all living things Az, you don't have to catch them" but it is in my nature (although I do also let them go sometimes,after all I have been lucky this year, and we all need a bit of luck) and a throwback to the time when I did not know where my next meal was coming from.

In other news I have been crossed the road in front of the house to go into Dave's field, but it was scary and a busy road, and the cars were so fast, that I have decided not to bother in future - in fact Mum fetched me back.  Dave also has a field directly behind Pam's house and there are plenty of other fields to watch and "hone my agricultural education".  There are some people who walk about with dogs in some of the fields and shoot guns at the sky.....I understand they are shooting at birds, but it does not seem a fair fight I must say....and as to work in the fields, they are still ploughing and getting sugar beet up (none of this seems to be suitable "normal food" - I will have to investigate further)  Dad has had a weird smell of other animal "fur" on his coat and it turns out that at the other farm they have "timeshare cows come to stay"  Apparently this is called "joisting" where some farmers have cows that live outside in Summer, but if they don't have enough shed space in Winter, then the cows essentially have board and lodgings at another farm which has shed space ...hmmmn interesting.....and not to be confused with jousting (I mixed them up initially when I was reading up to find out more, apparently jousting with a "u" is something to do with horses and people wearing metal suits (are humans strange or what?!) Still, "Each to their own, and live and let live"  Some people might think blogging is a funny thing for a cat to be doing, Will likes to sleep with his head raised up and is terrified of thunder storms.... "We are all different, that's what makes us all so endlessly fascinating!"

I've discovered a new drink too - or rather I "mugged" Mum for some - I couldn't help it, it smelt so nice.  She made herself a mug of something called Horlicks, but with all milk instead of water and it smelt lovely and malty (this is the day after Mum had shouted at me for sticking my claws in her and clawing the furniture as well but soon forgave me) so I had a bowlful and it was yummmy! I've invented a new song for myself too (it is to the tune of Kylie Minogue - or is that Meowogue? "Santa Baby" - and it goes like this..."Aslan Baby, share a mug of horlicks with me, you see, you're the best thing in fur, Aslan honey and hurry through the cat flap tooooniggght" - I have tried to teach it to Mum but although I am good, some things are just to tricky for mere humans!

Anyway, it is Christmas time, and on Christmas day I went on another mini road trip.....Mum and Dad went to Midnight Mass on Christmas eve, and when they came home early on Christmas Day they opened a present each (and one for me) then we all went to bed, and the next morning opened our presents - I got quite a few - mostly food related yay!  Then I was loaded up in my cat carrier - not impressed but felt sure it was not a bad journey - and we all went to Mum's for Christmas lunch.  Her cats Kitfer and Murphy were upstairs asleep - so I jogged up and downstairs a few times for the novelty really (they did not see me, I did not want to distress them in their home) ate a bit of lunch and went to sleep in the hallway.  Mum's sister Rachel and her husband Andrew were there - they are expecting a baby in the May.  In the evening, we all sat in the room and played games - then Mum picked me up and sat back and I spent a happy hour snuggling up against her, stretching out my long stripey legs and back paws and rubbing my head on her chin....although I have to say, had I been playing the Trival Pursuits type quiz that they were all playing, then I am sure I would have know more of the answers.  This is the Season of Peace and Goodwill to all (humans and animals) so I hope that all my furry brothers and sisters are happy, and I wish for all cats to have a happy and warm home. 

It's very nearly the Millennium - Happy New Year to us all - it's been a year of changes for me, but it's ended up brilliantly ............"sometimes you just have to have hope............."

this is me, on one of "my" beds..............

November 1999

I've been taking the opportunity to listen to Will a bit and we sit and talk during some of the day - inside if its cold and rainy (and Will is not required on the farm) or outside if it is warm enough - It's not been too cold yet.  Will is a typical man who does not show his emotions very clearly (I am a boy too, but very in touch with my feminine side - as most felines are) "There is nothing wrong with showing your emotions and talking about your feelings"  I think it helps Will to talk about his brother Gus and his life, and in return he listens to me....I hope my furry Mum and all my furry brothers and sisters are happy and well loved, and I would wish that no cat was ever abandonned like I was.  "All living creatures deserve love and affection, a safe place to rest, food, and freedom from fear"  I am quite enjoying Will's company too (sssshhh!)  Mum has had a few days off work too which is nice, but she was in and out a bit anyway, so I didn't see her for "full days" just like normal.  To be honest, this arrangement suits me fine, I can come in and out, have food, water, most of the house, a comfy warm bed on tap, and human hugs and knees to sit on, humans to drape myself on as I please - result!

So the reason Will has been about more often is because that Dad's Dad (Alan) had an accident a few weeks ago and has broken his arm.  Unfortunately, humans are not ambidextrously-pawed like most cats, so it really has had an impact on him.  He's not in as much pain now, but has had one of those funny white casts on it for weeks, and of course, this has meant that he can't do as much on the farm as he would normally.  Luckily, and this is something I do really admire about some humans, "everyone has really pulled together to help out"  Dad's brother Mick has had a few weeks off work, Dad's uncle and Cousin, John and Ben, have all helped out (Ben is a really good photographer, so I have been practising the art of "striking a pose" - I do love modelling when I am in the mood!)  Also, the neighbours here (Dave and Karen - Dave is Pam's brother and they live further down towards the village, but farm in the fields opposite us) the neighbours at Deeping (Bryan, Janet and James) have all offered help and assistance.  Mum and Mum's parents have all been doing their bit too in the taxi-ing about between farms (if you go over to the other farm in a car, then come back in a farm vehicle, that means you don't really have any fast means of transport to get back - and seriously, farm vehicles are soooo slow, I mean I could walk faster!)

When they have been over here, I have been watching Dad ploughing, it means a tractor pulling a "plough" this is a big bit of kit with lots of silvery "fin shaped things" (it puts me in mind of a lot of silver coloured fish!) as it moves up and down a field.  This is so that the remnants of the other crop can be ploughed in so they will decompose and not grow, and that the top layer of soil is turned over so there are fresh nutrients there - ** I would like to add that I learnt that all by myself, rather than relying on dog-standard-information**  

In other news. Mum's friend Adrienne popped round to see me (I have not met her before) and it was love at first sight for her (about me I mean, obviously!)  she said I have "Whopper Paws" and will be a big cat...but I am fully grown and I am careful what I eat - I don't want to put too much weight on - I have far too much jumping around and exploring to do!

this is Will and myself posing with Mum's car - as you can see it is not as posh as the other vehicle in the last blog entry!

October 1999

** Aslan's disclaimer ** for some reason, this post and the last few do not show correctly

and there is an issue with the "word wrap" hence some words are split between lines.

I have tried what I can to amend this, please bear with me, normal service is resumed after

the this blog entry xx

this is me, posing with a car belonging to relatives of our neighbours -

sadly it does not actually  belong to anyone I personally know myself......

a shame as it suits a cat of my standing don't you think?

Okay, so I have settled in quite well here, I have quite a good routine going, but it is sometimes "invaded" by the farm. This is evidently the "potato time of the year" as in the potato harvest there are some very strange bits of kit about. There is a huge conveyor belt type thing set up in the big shed which is really noisy. The potatoes (boring to me but apparently a multi-functional vegetable) arrive in a tractor and trailer, are moved along the conveyor belt, sorted and either put in a big heap, or bagged up into 25kg bags. This process takes ages and there are people coming and going in and out of the shed all day long ...even Mum helps a bit when she is back from work (but after she's fed me!) I take the opportunity to continue my "rodent watch" and nose round the farm and the sheds - Oh and I'm also honing my knowledge too. When it's cold, or when I am tired, I have a snooze in the straw or more likely, I mosey my way back to the house to have a sleep in peace and quiet!

I have discovered that some relatives of Pam's visit quite often, and they parktheir car on our driveway as it is safer, being off the road.  As you can see,     I like this car very much and it suits me too!  It is much more "me" than the   functional cars Mum and Dad drive, or any of the farm vehicles - Will quite      likes the tractors but I have not yet found one that is really "me"

I have been talking to Will a bit more of late, he might be rubbish and not at all knowledgeable when it comes to farming, but he has told me a sad story   about his brother.  Andy (Dad) used to live in an old farm house here with Will (William) and his brother Gus (Guscott).....yes, Dad is into his rugby and they were named after some rugby players called Will Carling and Jeremy Guscott. 

There was also an adopted stray kitten (also ginger) called Ginger - he lived  with them for about 18 months...when Ginger was a kitten, Dad found that     Ginger's Mum had sadly been killed on the road, so he went looking for the    kitten and took him in, giving him a home.  Shortly before the old farm house had to be replaced with a new bungalow, Ginger went missing (Dad tried hard to find him) and then a few months later, poor Gus was killed on the road too. That meant Will was alone - I felt quite sorry for him and resolved to be more understanding towards him after all......

"we none of us know what other people have to deal with”  

as someone once said, 

“if everyone's problems were put in a heap for all to choose from,              you would soon grab your own ones back”..




I have discovered that Dad is a great cook and really enjoys cooking – 

he eats meat and  pretty much everything...disappointingly, Mum appears 

to be one of those vegetarians.....but they both cook meat, there is a butcher in the village, and I do often get a sample if it is meat  

NOW I JUST NEED TO PERSUADE MUM AND DAD TO GET SOME VEHICLES      WHICH ARE MUCH MORE SUITABLE FOR A CAT OF MY STANDING TO POSE      WITH - I MIGHT EVEN HAVE TO GET SOME SHADES!

September 1999

** Aslan's disclaimer ** for some reason, this post and the next few do not show correctly

and there is an issue with the "word wrap" hence some words are split between lines.

I have tried what I can to amend this, please bear with me, normal service is resumed after

the next few blog entries xx




I've been to see a new vet – his name is Wayne – and he called me “Spud”    He said I was  12-18 months old (very accurate for a mere human!) I am a neutered male cat and in good health.   I decide I like Wayne, and bestow on him a lot of purrs and a good nosy round his surgery.  He then gives me an      injection (am not sure I like that) and a tablet.  Mum and Wayne discuss my  background “he was a stray......” and my new home, Mum is not keen  on me wearing a collar  (I am definitely not either) as it could get caught up whilst I am out and about – which would be very dangerous....So I am to be micro-chipped instead.  I like this vets, and Wayne – especially when he says I am  “a fine example of a healthy cat”  and, he reassures Mum that the pigment     spots on my paws, nose and mouth are not a problem – although I could have told her that if she was able to understand me!  A lot of cats think  their vets are scary and do not like them, but I    have always thought you should, “judge people as you find them”.  And from the same “thought   family," “treat people as you would  want to be treated yourself”


** HOT NEWS **  Dad has fitted a cat flap in the garage door for me (yay...   this is even sooner than I thought he would do it according to my “secret       agenda”......it is important to “work towards what you want, and know what   direction you want to go in”) – he's done a good job, and the internal door is  open so I have access to some / most/ all  of the other rooms too.  It's been quite sunny so I have been in and out of the house and down on the  farm. They seem to be working here quite a bit which is nice for the company and to learn more about my chosen craft  (I have decided to become the new farm supervisor)  but some of the machinery is just so noisy it means I can't hear myself think Will seems quite content to ride up and down fields in a tractor,   “woof” to get out, run up and down until he barks to be let back in the tractor.  I've asked him what some of the bits of kit do on the farm..  but he doesn't really know –and I suspect he makes a lot of it up himself too.I have resolved that it would be better to learn this for myself!


My Grandma comes round and visits me a lot, she is a lovely person too.  Mum's parents are   divorced and I see them both.  Dad's parents are still together and they both work on the farm   so they are often both here when  the work is being done on this farm, sometimes their dog       Jake comes too, I was wary of him as he is a big, black labrador  (huge paws and head) but he is very chilled out and calm around cats – he is not much use on the subject of  farm machinery either though – dogs eh?!!

okay so not the best photo due to the shadow of the house, but hey, you know sometimes, I am  just not in the right mood to "strike a pose" at someone else's whim..............this is me strolling elegantly back towards the house....as you can see, I make good use of the cat walk (in both     senses) and am a real "tail-up strolling boy"

August 1999

** Aslan's disclaimer ** for some reason, this post and the next few do not show correctly

and there is an issue with the "word wrap" hence some words are split between lines.

I have tried what I can to amend this, please bear with me, normal service is resumed after

the next few blog entries xx

Yay!  Imprisonment ended!  However, as I am so desperate to get out and     explore, it is fair to say that this does not go according to Mum's plan.  Mum    carries me outdoors – neither the back nor the front garden are enclosed, and there are lots of open fields and farm land/yards about.  I take the opportun- ity to a) demonstrate my athleticism and b) enjoy FREEDOM so I leap out of  her arms and “leg it” across the lawn, up a massive tree and on to a 10 foot   high wall between my house and the next house (as you can tell, I had this   PLANNED!)  I had noticed that there was a high wall as there are a lot of brick build sheds attached to it on our side of the wall (I had noticed this from the study window) and that there were big trees for easy access.  I demonstrate my prowess by stalking across the wall several times then nonchalantly sitting and having a wash.  I studiously ignore the cries and pleas of “Aslan”, come   here babes, please” and the next thing I know, Mum and Dad are in the next door garden with the neighbours, who I now know are called Pam and Gordon  (they have a dog called Meg too)   Gordon says, “Hello cat, don't look at me  with that supercilious expression” (I am not quite sure what this means, I willhave to look it up ... “never be afraid to fill in the gaps in your knowledge – it is never too late” ) but although they are not “cat people” I can tell, they  think I am a “very fine cat indeed” (that's from a quote!)    I jump off the wall on my side whilst they are still in the other garden (humans do have a bit of a design fault when it comes to jumping and climbing unlike us cats) and by     the time they have come the long way round, I am GONE down the driveway  and into the farm yard for a proper old “nebs” at EVERYTHING.  Lots of bits of machinery (I will take care as it could be dangerous, but it looks great fun to  climb and investigate), lots of space, warm sheds, hay, grass, crops, rodents! (I am a champion hunter, I think) hideouts – I think this is not a bad place to live – I may well have landed on all 4 paws. 

 I am so into nosing about and   having my freedom back that I forget to go   back for my tea, or supper, and I  don't realise just how worried Mum is.  The next day I am sauntering up to thehouse when she spots me and calls, I come running and have some food,  she picks me up for a chutch and is about to go back into the house –NOOOHHH!  I squirm and scratch, Mum drops me and I  land badly – she feels guilty, but I am not hurt, and in fact within 20 seconds I am on the wall again.  This time Mum gets a ladder out, picks me up and I  scratch her (she still has this scar   years later) and I am off.  It is only later  in the day when I see her walking down the road asking other further neigh-   bours if they have seen me, that I feel a (very tiny) bit remorseful.  I go back and have a love up with Mum, and I think we both have the measure of each  other now – food, drink, a warm bed, a safe home and lots of love will always be available here, and the farm is mine to explore as I please as long as I am careful.....yay, best of both  worlds then ( I am one lucky cat !)  However,     there are loads of places to explore and I am working on a plan …...I've tried  to enlist Will, but he didn't seem very interested, or maybe he didn't under-   stand (being only a dog)  I'm not sure he would be the best side-kick to have anyway...........I may be the brains of the operation, but I want someone who could follow a simple instruction and not be distracted by a dog biscuit or a    human calling!

Me, nonchalently strolling back into the kitchen (Mum says to say the photo is in bad light and the floor is not really that dirty!)